It’s dark now as I sit pretending to be a receptionist, wondering where all the basement parties are in London.

Not that I’m going to them even if they exist. I’m pretending to be a receptionist. Remember? In between being stared at by drunks like I’m a fucking fish and drinking wine from a mug I’ve compiled a few d/l freebies for you. You’re welcome.

Eugene Quell – Eugene Otto Quell

know, I know, this was released on New Years Day. I’m sure you all already have it. But if not you need it. Trust me. I liked it so much I bought the T-shirt which you can’t put in a washing machine because it will fucking melt. It’s totally worth it.

This is the first offering from Tobias Hayes’ new solo material. You of course remember Meet Me In St Louis and Shoes & Socks Off, right? This is nothing like either. I’ve struggled for some time to actually figure out how I would categorize this. I’m still unsure. Something something lo-fi. It has beautifully fuzzed guitar lines, straight beating drums and Tobias’ lovely vocal melodies and double tracked harmonies. It’s singer-songwriter music for anyone who hates that term. It’s intimately personal, but beautifully opaque. It’s gurt lush.

USA Nails – Seat Licker

USA Nails are a magical blend. A head-banging, pounding mesh of shouts and noise weaved by members of Kong, Hawk Eyes, Death Pedals and Silent Front. Listen to this scratchy recording: the verse’s rising scales, the resolving chords, the driving drums, the impending dissonance and the lurking anger. It propels along like Eagulls but kicks and screams harder. They’re playing London, Manchester and Chorley over the next few days and then taking a break till September so go and see them for fuck’s sake.

JazzHands – Gold

I have a bizarre relationship with saxophones. As soon as I heard Less Than Jake’s Gainseville Rock City I thought I’d found eternal love. Time proved to stymie this love. I grew a distaste for American accented music favouring Adequate 7 and Capdown and the rawness that they brought. Whatever that means. Then I told Ska to fuck off. I opted for finger-tapping guitar riffs and loud-as-fuck beatdowns. I wanted distortion rather than awkward political rhymes.

I like to think I’ve managed to check my inner music snob somewhat. And in come JazzHands. Three drummers, a sax and bass. I guess that might put some off, but I wouldn’t worry. Their two track bandcamp d/l is Gold. They find well known melodies, beat them together into a groove and then break out of it almost as quickly. Dead As Gold spits and shakes and echoes a carnival atmosphere in some of the sax/bass lines. It’s bizarre, dizzying and ebullient. The finale to Return Of The Wolf blends the theme of the wolf from Prokofiev’s Peter and the Wolf with triplicate blast beats in a maddened frenzy. Saxophones haven’t sounded so good since Capdown.